“What is up with the way you dress these days?” I shot this question to my 12-year-old just as we sat down to dinner a couple nights ago.

“What do you mean?” she replied without looking up.

“I mean…” me, “By the way, where did you get those super tight skinny jeans?”

“Dad bought them for me.” the kid replied with a mischievous grin.

Hubby was working late as usual. I made a mental note to have a chat with him later, and will forbid him from buying clothes for the kids.

“Okay. Then explain this ridiculously small hot pink tank-top, that does not provide the necessary coverage to even call it clothing!” me.

“That’s why I wear a t-shirt inside of my tank-top.” 12-year-old.

“Exactly! You look like a demented teenager all of sudden.” me.

“And this purple strand of hair you got!” me.

“It’s FAKE!” 12-year-old.

“I know! But why?” me.

12-year-old got quiet.

My 9-year-old was watching us with great interest, while chewing on the dinner.

“Tell me why.” me, in my demanding tone.

“This group of girls at school always make fun of me. They tell me that I look stupid.” 12-year-old said with a sad kind of look.

“You don’t look stupid! I do all your shopping at Gymboree and GapKids.” me, seriously offended.

“Exactly.” 12-year-old said pointedly.

“Oh, you mean, the kids laugh at you because I send you to school wearing this purple tee with a giraffe across it, and the giraffe has these big googly eyes, and long eye lashes?” I said thoughtfully.

12-year-old nodded, “Let’s not forget the light blue colored polka dot capri shorts you think goes so well with this giraffe shirt.”

“Fine. No more Gymboree for you. They stop at age 12 anyway.” me.

“Tell me more about these girls at school. Do you know any of them?” me.

“I don’t know any of them. They are a group of 4 or 5 girls, all 8th graders. They like to tell me and a few other kids that we look stupid everyday after school. They are like the school fashion police. ” 12-year-old.

“Everyday! They make fun of you everyday?” me.

“Yes, everyday. They have been doing this for a long time now. Well, except most of the Fridays.” 12-year-old.

“Why not on Fridays?” me.

“Because on Fridays, they usually have detention after school.” 12-year-old.

“And how do these girls dress?” me.

“Well…” 12-year-old, “Actually, they are these kids that get cited a lot for clothing violations, and the school make them change into their PE clothes in the middle of the day.”

“……..” me.

“They like to wear very short skirts, and see-through tops.” 12-year-old, started to chuckle.

Ah, the peer pressure… I conducted many, many talk sessions with my kids to warn them against the threaded peer pressure.

“Didn’t I tell you?! That overwhelming majority of teens are morons. So, if you give in to their peer pressure, you will also become a moron!” me.

“You kids prefer to be smart, right?!” me.

Both kids were nodding energetically.

I was disappointed that my child had resorted to conform with these bullies’ fashion ideas.

Later that evening.

“Mom, we are really!” The kids shouted from upstairs. This means that they were set for bed, and were ready for me to kiss them good night. Yes, this 12-year-old still expected her mommy to tuck her in at night.

A quick idea popped into my head. I decided to entertain them with an one-person skit…

I stumped upstairs with deliberate loud steps, while screaming, “ MOMmmm….!!!

I entered their bedroom, and found the kids staring back at me looking bewildered. Good. I got their attention.

“Mom! The kids at school are laughing at me. They said that I look stupid.” me, acting as if I were my 12-year-old.

I jumped around to play the role of myself next, looking awfully concerned, “What kids?! What do they look like?”

I jumped back to play my 12-year-old again, “ The kids who get clothing citations at school all the time. They wear short, short bottoms, and see-through tops.”

I jumped around to play myself again, “Oh great! We will get you some skinny jeans that will fit you like a pair of tights. And we will find you a spaghetti strap tank-top at least 3 sizes too small.” me, then clapping my hands and acting super excited, “Uh, then may be they will let you join them at their Friday detentions.”

The kids were floored by my performance, as they rolled on the bedroom carpet holding their stomachs laughing, in their totally adorable Gymboree pjs.

Gymboree pj

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